When he has an “accident,” the message is clear. “I told you how much I hated your new toilet fetish, and you obviously didn’t listen. I tried to be patient and reasonable, but you ignored me. Now do you understand? Do you? Do you?”
An “accident” is his attempt to communicate. It should be responded to by meeting his needs, going backward, and nurturing him. Remember, he’s letting you know he’s stressed, and that’s sad. “Accidents” should never be punished. Punishments backfire. (Just ask this girl I know. She tossed her naughty cat out in the snow, and he responded by running back into the house, pulling down her favorite leather coat, and peeing on it. You never win a cat fight.)
Cats love interesting new things and feeling smart. Toilet training is fun. Watch his cues, so you can keep the peace and graduate accident-free. It’s so worth it: rewarding and gratifying. And just think, if you nurture great communication with your cat, you can save the therapy $ for your other relationships. Now that’s an achievement!